Exeter

3pm, Exeter
St. Andrew the unstained saint
There’s lots that’s had to have been restored
I know the feeling
Turbulence
And wondering whether some components of the clockwork, the stonework
Is absent
Lost but not successfully replaced.

But, hey, you have a sandwich bar in the Undercroft, which is cool.
Of all rivalries, yours with Jesus College is the most infamous
The Britney Spears of collegiate feuds
Even in the 70s there was chaos
Sometimes around the Oxford Revolution of ‘74
Fire and rioting on Turl Street
To the scoffs of Lincoln
Poisoning with ivy through their secret door.

In this quad, Morse died
To pass on his legacy
But to be on the safe side
I’ll not come here with a heart condition,
(Not that there’s any danger of that).

The tiniest staircase leads up
And the customary inexplicable abstract statue
Offering, as ever, no clues to its concrete conclusions
Let it not rain
There’s only so many times I can use consecrated roofs to keep dry
And nothing could successfully drive me to the college gym.

You’re a bit limited − but then I guess you’re one of those more pressed for space places
I’m not sure what I was expecting
Except to watch a University Challenge match between Exeter College and Exeter University.
Not that I’ve been to the city.

No jostling for you, you know where you are
And are probably happy with it.
Am I running out of puff
Oh peaks of spires beyond?
Should I go home and get a pastry during the deluge?
Come back later?
Well, when I say come back
I mean carry on
I’ll finish here first, don’t you worry
I get the job done,
Most times.
And here I’d say the job was done.
I don’t want to call you a failure:
It might be my fault, but…